You’ve chosen several photos from your online dating service and sent out your personal online profile. Now you are waiting for the replies to start rolling in. You wait a few days, and nothing. You start to feel as though you should go back to the bars, at least the rejection there is face to face. What could have gone wrong?
First of all, these people don’t know you, so you can’t realistically take a lack of response too personally. Often users of online dating services have a stack of profiles next to their computer and take their time returning emails, so don’t get discouraged.
The worst mistake you can make is contacting people over and over. This can turn them off and give the impression that you are a stalker, some dating services online will cancel your membership or censure you if they receive reports of continuous attempts to contact ( as well they should. Remember, they don’t know your motives any more than you know anyone else’s when online.)
Another online dating tip is to contact as many people that have an interesting profile as possible. If you only contact two or three, and then wait weeks for a reply, of course you’re going to get frustrated, but if you send contact emails to 20 different people, chances are you will receive several replies. Again, do not take it personally! There are hundreds of free online dating sites to choose from, and those are just the free ones. I have a personal confidence in sites like eHarmony and Match.com though. It’s always been my personal belief that you get what you pay for. If you are joining free dating sites – then what message is that sending? If you are willing to pay for a quality service – you might have better luck in meeting your match.
If you are continuously getting rejection emails (I don’t mean lack of replies, but true, actual rejections) maybe the problem is your profile. Recheck it and see what it says about you. Is it honest and sincere? Did you send your best picture? Does it sound too needy or too non committal?
There are lots of services that offer to help with putting together the perfect profile. I even have an offer to critique or rewrite your personal ad – based on years of working in the online dating industry, I’ve got a pretty good handle on what works and what doesn’t – I’m always happy to provide tips to help people find love.
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