Holly Jacobs is and has been learning a lesson the hard way. In a nutshell –
During a lengthy relationship, Holly sent "those kind of pictures" to her boyfriend Ryan Seay.
Holly and Ryan break up
"Those pictures" made their way to the internet and began appearing on "revenge porn" websites, online sites where scorned exes publish intimate photos without consent.
Jacobs has turned her experience into a crusade to urge lawmakers to pass a law that would criminalize acts of cyber stalking. Right now, New Jersey is the only state that prohibits cyber stalking behavior.
Jacobs urges other victims to speak up –
“Stand up for what you feel is right. It’s not OK that people are doing this and exploiting you, just because you trusted somebody and because you shared intimate photographs in an intimate relationship,” she said. “That’s not the problem here. The problem is that somebody is using this against you and trying to drive you to suicide. They’re ruining our lives. That’s not OK.”
Holly has filed a civil suit against Seay. The lawsuit charges Seay with stalking and emotional distress. Of course Seay pleads "Hacked" and that he was not the person who distributed the images.
Jacobs adamantly rejects criticism from people who said she should have never taken or sent the pictures.
What Holly Jacobs is doing is noble. I do appreciate her speaking up against these actions – I don’t entirely agree with her position though. To speak out and try to pass laws against cyber stalking is fine and good, but speak LOUDER against succumbing to the urge or pressure of others to take intimate pictures and share them.
We live in a world where blame is often placed elsewhere. It’s become more "human" to point the finger than to take responsibility for our own actions, mistakes and shortcomings.
I’m of the belief that if you take the pictures and send them to someone – you should be prepared for the worst because people get angry – people do stupid things in a moment of rage. Those people may regret their actions later, but when it comes to the digital communications – secrets do not exist and loyalty lives on a slippery slope.
For every action, there are consequences – sometimes those consequences just plain suck! Jacobs would be better off focusing on turning the negative into something good. Apart from identifying information that could lead pervs to her door, she should eat crow, as bitter as it might be! At least that’s my opinion.