This is an adaption of a post shared by a friend on Facebook (author unknown). The original "copy" I read focused on single men and women, however, I saw the value as it applies to those who are married as well.
Because I am female, the list addresses He/Me as such. Whether you are male or female, you can easily fit yourself into the appropriate places throughout this list.
Additionally, my friend is seeking commentary from readers and encouraging the suggestion of rules that might be added to this list.
Lessons that MUST be learned in relationships:
1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
3. If you have ANY doubt about a man's character, leave him alone.
4. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
6. Don't force an attraction.
7. Slower is better.
8. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you happy.
9. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you well, then NO you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
10. Have faith in God regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid. God does things decent and in order.
11. Don't settle.
12. If you think he is stringing you along, he probably is.
13. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship–take that BIG sign as he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?
14. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll regret it later.
15. Honorable men take care of their business and aren't involved in many messes.
16. The only person you control in a relationship is you.
17. There's only ONE ‘reason' a man dumps you; he doesn't WANT you.
18. Avoid men with several children by different women. Observe the way he treats them and the level of responsibility he takes. He won't treat you better!
19. You really do have to kiss a few frogs before finding the prince.
20. Always put yourself and YOUR happiness first.
21. Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
22. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
23. If he doesn't call, he isn't interested.
24. Be honest and upfront.
25. Don't allow yourself to be strung along.
26. Don't fall for the "I'm confused" excuse. Remove yourself from the situation. Let him figure things out and don't wait on him.
27. If you want to know how he will treat you, watch how he treats ALL the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).
28. There are 3 kinds of abuse; physical, emotional and mental. If he causes any of them…flee.
29. You cannot change a man's behaviors. Change comes from within.
30. Don't let him place rules on you that he is not willing to follow himself — double-standard.
31. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are…even if he has more education or a better job.
32. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more, nothing less.
33. Be a person who commands respect. If he can't give it, he can't have you!
34. Don't compete or compare yourself to other women. Be aware that men are attracted to what they SEE. There's a difference in "observing" and "ogling" Know the difference, it's a matter of respect!
35. If you think he is cheating, he probably is. Confront him right away and if you feel he's lying, let him go.
36. Actions speak louder than words, but silence is deafening!
37. Never let a man define you.
38. Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.
39. Never borrow someone else's man.
40. If he cheated WITH you, he WILL cheat ON you.
41. Just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won't hurt you!
42. To use painful hard-won wisdom — ‘get it right' the next time.
43. You deserve to be the #1 person in the life of the #1 person in your life.
44. Love IS a verb …
45. Learn to give up your the task of trying to make someone who is unavailable-available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving.
46. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
47. What it takes to win your heart is what it takes to KEEP your heart.
48. If he acts like you can't do anything RIGHT, he's doing something WRONG!
49. Never GIVE more than you are willing to lose.